Announcement

Hey, readers!

If you haven't, go read my new website, www.knockedaskew.com  and follow along with my musings and shenanigans that accompany my college life.

Peace, love, and more love,
Sara

Life’s Strange Doings

    I realize that I’m only seventeen, but I think that it is very safe to say that I am much older mentally. Sometimes I feel so old and I have to remind myself that my life has only just started.
    Over a week ago a fifteen year old boy at my school took his own life. His death sent my small southern town into a state of shock that has carried many forms since the day we all found out that he was dead. This town has a habit of forming rumors and spreading them like wildfire. While no one actually knew or understood why he killed himself, some seemed determined to jump to bullying. If any of the people who accused that poor girl for bullying him is reading this, I’d like to have your attention. It was bizarre to me to see how people who really had nothing to go on so swiftly made up stories and only saw the things that made their claims seem more valid. I swear to god, I live in the Twilight Zone. These students AND adults jumped on a bandwagon to harass a girl who they were hearing rumors about. How pathetic we are as a species to not learn anything from the hurt that the boy already suffered. Would he have wanted revenge even if he was bullied? No. He was a kind person. He was not petty and he did not seek out revenge.
   He killed himself. Yes, bullying is a problem. But how can the idiots of this town not realize that by bullying another child you are doing nothing but cause more harm? Harm that does not need to be done.
   I beg you all to love one another as if everyone you come into contact with is family. We have so much hate in this world. Please make a conscious effort to spread love instead.

Peace, love, and compassion,
Sara

I am spiritual

I am spiritual. I am not religious. I read the bible occasionally for inspiration as the language is used quite beautifully. I do not go to church. I believe that church is where I feel closest to something more than this. In my seventeen years of being a creature on this planet I have found that my sanctuary is in nature. It is where no human hand has killed, corrupted and tortured the landscape that we are all connected to.

I don’t have to have a specific god to be happy. I feel free and loved as I am. I understand that everything is temporary and that nothing is permanent. Both good and bad, everything comes to an end.
I feel like a new person. A new happy person. Folks, being happy is a pretty great step for me.

I like to think that my happiness has bloomed greatly over this summer. I met my best friend for the first time and he eventually became my boyfriend. I grew even closer (though I didn’t realize that was possible) to my family. I made so many new friends at Girls State and broke out of my comfort zone even more. I get to have my favorite English teacher for my last semester in high school. My drama club is going to put on a fantastic play that I hope to be as much a part of as possible.
This summer has been full of surprises to say the least. I have surprised myself and others have surprised me in return. Thankfully, they have all been wonderful surprises.

Peace, love, and happiness,
Sara

Say, Sara- Best Advice?

Say, Sara, what’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?
                                        -Jennisha

   I’ve been thinking about this question for a while now and I’ve finally found my answer. At first I wanted to dig up some deep and meaningful advice that had been given to me, but instead my thoughts centered around three words: Never give up. I know that seems pretty stupid seeing as how I’ve heard so many influential lectures in my life, but give me a moment to explain.

  That advice was given to me by my dad. Sure, my mom said the same things, but I really remember him saying is every time I got frustrated or angry because I couldn’t achieve something. As long as I have been a citizen of this planet I have been a very determined individual. I hate giving up on things. I want to see every idea I have through to fruition despite the many obstacles that might be in my path. 

What’s funny about my dad being the one to give me this advice is that he’s the exact opposite of me. I’m super liberal and not religious. He’s on the far right.

My best boy :)                                                                                                                                 

    Sometimes I wonder if he regrets teaching me to stand up for what I believe in considering that my ideals are much different than his.

    I’m not sorry in the least that I’m a Democrat. I love the Liberal bumper stickers on the back of my car. I jump at the chance to share my opinions with a class full of close minded Republicans.

    There have been very few times in my life when I’ve been so angry with someone that I saw red. Those times centered around someone saying that I wanted to kill babies and a girl screaming down the hall way that “gay people are wrong.” I’ve never wanted to punch someone that much in my life. That girl is a bitch, and that’s the nicest thing I can say about her.

My "Be Human" bumper sticker 

                                                                                                                                    

     I don’t like the way our family communicates sometimes. I don’t like the fact that I can only talk politics around my mom and brother without my dad getting up and leaving the table. While I don’t understand or agree with any of the Republican ideologies, I do realize that everyone is entitled to their own opinions. I just want my dad to be more open minded. 

The people in this town that are Repubs (which is the grand majority) carry around so much anger all the time. It’s like this cloud of hostility and hatred just hangs around all the time. No one bothers to get their information from a credible source. Fox news doesn’t have the facts, by the way. That news station is run by bigots. Down with the bloody bigots, I say!

    To get back on topic, I will never give up on the idea of a world where my children can marry whomever they choose. I will never give up on equality for all humans. I will never give up on the fact that our founding fathers knew how important it was to keep church and state separate. You want to talk unconstitutional? I’ll give you unconstitutional (but not in this post).

Know that I love you, dad, for teaching me to hold my values highly and proudly. I know that you can’t see the world through my eyes, but maybe if you use just a little imagination, you can catch a glimpse.

                                              Peace, love, and equality,

                                                                                                    Sara

What I Learned at VGS

About a week after school was out, I attended a program called Volunteer Girls State. The program, for those of you who have no idea about what I’m referring to, is a week long foray into the government.
You learn about each branch of the government as well as creating a fictional state government. But VGS is so much more than that.

Weeks before I went to VGS I began worrying about it. As you may know, I’m a Democrat living in a primarily Republican state. Naturally, I dreaded that there would be no other girls with my same views on world issues. I knew that I would stand up for what I believe in, but I was afraid that I would be the only one.
HA! That was yet another example of my worrying too much.

What I found after I unloaded the majority of my personal belongings into my dorm room, was a group of girls that I never expected.

My roommate Samiha, Khushbu, and myself 

My roommate and I had long talks at night making fun of Republicans and laughing hysterically. I met a girl named Niman on the first day and guess what? She’s a Liberal! In fact, she ended up representing us in Girls Nation.

Niman! 

I met a girl who I would later refer to as Soul Sister Julia. Our first conversation went something like this:

Soul Sister Julia and I before the Gubernatorial  inauguration 

Me: Oh, I’m sorry. I’m in the way.
Julia: No! You’re fine!
Me: Those are cool… glasses.
Julia: Thanks!
Me: My name’s Sara. I’m incredibly awkward.
Julia: My name’s Julia and I’m incredibly awkward as well. We’re going to be great friends.

I met two fantastic girls in chorus and talk to them nearly everyday.

Chorus girls! Emily, me, and Gabby 

It made me incredibly happy to see myself break out of my shell. When I came there, I was a shy and extremely reserved person. Now I am not afraid of talking to strangers. I’m not afraid to show the world who I am. I’m not afraid to say, “Yeah,  I’m a Democrat. Tell me why it’s wrong to have an opinion that differs from yours.”
There was something that a speaker said at the closing ceremony that really made a lump form in my throat. She said, “Parents, VGS is known for igniting a spark within young women to make a change for the better in this world. When you go home today you will see this spark in their eyes. Absolutely DO NOT try to extinguish that flame. If anything, let it grow. Let them catch fire. And girls, never let yourself or anyone else dim your flame. You are important and you CAN make a difference.”

Needless to say, I went home sobbing. I was sure that I would never have friends as beautiful and kind as those that I met over the week. These people knew me at six o’clock in the morning when I shambled into the bathroom with crazy hair and no make up. And you know what? They didn’t care.  But just as I was wrong in thinking that I would be the only Liberal out of 500+ girls, I know that I will be wrong in thinking that I will never again find friends as beautiful and as intelligent as the girls that I met while I was there.
I love you all!

Dear reader, take my advice and live as if everyone you meet already knows you and accepts you. Sure, you'll run into a few angry souls along the way, but I assure you that there are far more caring people in the world than you know.

Peace, love, and bed-heads,
Sara

Say, Sara- Boyfriends

Say Sara,
I'm 17. I just read your article for the Aiming Low website about not having to have a boyfriend . I know its from a while ago, but I was wondering if you could help me out a bit.
Usually, I feel the same as you: I don't need a boyfriend to make me happy. I can be happy on my own, being independent, and free from all the other things attached to having a boyfriend, etc. Recently I have been trying to focus a lot more on my art (which has been improving-yay!) and taking the time to read more and follow my passions. I've also been spending a lot of time with my best girlfriends, and I've opened up to making a lot more new friends in my school. I still have a lot I want to do, but I think I am making a good start.
But then there are some days where I just feel so down about not having a boyfriend. And it's not just having a boyfriend, it's the whole thing--I've never ever kissed a guy and I'm 17.
I am an independent person. I am happy with myself. I have great friends, a great family. I am outgoing, and I make friends easily, people think I am fun to be around. I'm pretty in my own way. I'm not the skinniest, I'm not the hottest, but I'm past all those body issues--I like the way I look. And I am pretty intelligent (please don't think I'm arrogant for saying all this, I am just being honest about what I think.) I do feel insecure sometimes, but who doesn't?
But that's the thing that I don't get--people always say that once you do like yourself, and become your own person, others will see it and be attracted to it. I just don't understand why guys don't seem to ever ask me out or anything. I'm friends with a lot of guys, and I feel comfortable around them. But one guy I had a crush on a while ago, he liked this girl who wouldn't even talk to him. I just don't get it--why do these guys find these other girls more attractive than me? When I feel like I have what they are looking for, why is it they just don't seem interested in being more than friends? Why is it so hard to be happy about being single sometimes? What can I do to cheer myself up when I'm feeling down about it? Have you ever had a boyfriend since then?
Thanks so much for your help!
Mary
 
First of all, I think that we might in fact be the same person. You have many of the same opinions as I do!
I’d like to just say that although I do stand by what I wrote in the article, I feel down occasionally when all of my girlfriends are going on and on about their boyfriends. I am seventeen as well and, like you, I’ve never even kissed a guy. 
For most of my junior year, I couldn’t quite understand why guys just didn’t like me. They were always interested in someone else and I always looked incredibly stupid when I told them that I liked them. And then, with much observation and a few words from my mom, I came to a conclusion: guys our age just don’t know how to handle our level of maturity and intelligence. I don’t think it’s arrogant at all for you to know that you’re smart. That’s a great quality to have. Guys are incredibly intimidated by smart girls. We make them feel inferior whether we mean to or not. Why? Because there is absolutely nothing more powerful or scary than an intelligent woman.
As an artist myself (more with music and writing) I tend to be more outspoken and open minded. Artists are intelligent, not always in the conventional ways, but in ways that say, “I know who I am!”
Many people our age have no idea who they are. They’re still trying to figure it out. I’m not sure about how you feel, but I know who I am and how I fit into this crazy world for the most part. This goes along with the whole intelligence thing. Guys don’t like seeming weak. Even if it’s all in their head, they may feel like the weaker part of the relationship when they see a successful and smart woman taking charge of her life.
I totally get what you mean when you say that you don’t understand why those guys see those other girls as more attractive. I don’t want to seem shallow, but sometimes when a guy I liked once shows me a picture of his current girlfriend, I just have to think, “Really?”
 
So, when you’re feeling down about it, try thinking about the future. I think about college and I smile. I know that there will be loads of guys there who are artists themselves and who are every bit as intelligent as I am. Frankly, if no guys your age can appreciate your smarts, they aren’t worth it!
Thank you again for the questions. I hope I was able to help in some way!
 
Peace, love, and pencils,
Sara

Say, Sara- Successful?

Wow, I have definitely neglected my Say, Sara page for a while but it’s great to see that a few of you have sent in great questions! For those who have no idea what Say, Sara is you should click the link on the navigation bar and shoot me an email if you feel so inclined. The question that I  will be answering today has to do with blogging in general”

QUESTION TIME!
When did you first realize that your blog was successful?
(To me, a successful blog is one that has at least 50 followers/members, preferably ones you don't know.)
~Chynna

When I first began writing my blog I was so excited when I was able to say that I had five followers. Gaining followers to a blog is much more difficult than gaining followers on Twitter; therefore, it takes a bit more patience and time to know that what you want to say is being heard.
I considered my blog successful when I received an email from a reader that said something along the lines of how my words had inspired them. This made me feel amazing! Knowing that my words could reach even a single person was a fantastic achievement for me and still remains one of my greatest motivations in my life. That one message, and the many others that followed it, made me realize that I had something that could be considered valuable to some. I love reaching out to younger audiences as well. It makes me feel as though I have been able to help them through some of their bad days when I write something about being bullied or standing up for what’s right.
With all of that being said, I consider my blog an achievement on the basis that if I could make a difference for a single life, then I have done something worthwhile.

Thank you for the question!
Peace, love, and optimism,
Sara

If you would like to ask a personal question, ask for advice, or find out why my favorite food is sushi check out the Say, Sara page and hit me up!

Thanks

It’s Mother’s day, which means I’m writing this post for my mom.

Mom,
             Thank you for loving me no matter what. Thank you for loving me despite my anxieties and my depressions. Despite my mood swings and the days when I just don’t know what to do with myself, you’re    always there for me.

You make me laugh when I feel bad, and that’s a pretty big accomplishment. Honestly, you’re my best friend. You don’t judge me like everyone else around here does. You love me for who I am, and I cannot express how much that means to me.

A few nights ago when you were talking to Nate and I in the kitchen, you told us that if either of us were gay, you would love us the very same. How lucky I am to have a parent who understands what it means to love someone unconditionally. It makes me so sad to think of all of the children who are homosexual and have parents who are not supportive.
You raised me to be independent and to love myself regardless of what people say. You taught me that it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks or says as long as I love my own choices. Life is too short to be defined by what others think.
I am so lucky to have a mom who taught me how to think for myself. I’m definitely a free spirit. I’m an old soul. You understand those parts of me. You understand that I question everything and you respect me for that.
I truly hope that I’ve made you happy and proud throughout all of the seventeen years that I’ve been alive. Thank you for bringing me into this world, no matter how much it sucks to be a citizen of this planet sometimes. I know that I’m here to make a change for the better, and so I suppose that I can put up with all of the idiots that try to get in my way.

Peace, love, and having a mom who rocks,
                                                                                        Sara

A Shortish Announcement

To everyone in my school or in my town who has the belief that I am a lesbian. I am not, in fact, attracted to girls. I know that you might be thinking. “But Sara keeps her hair short! She supports gay rights! She likes bands we’ve never heard of!”
Okay, okay. I get that the last part of that had nothing to do with anything. I’m just in that sort of mood.
Now, let me answer a few of the questions that I’m assuming quite a few people in my school are too afraid to ask me.

Are you gay? No, actually, I’m not. Last time I checked, I’m pretty straight. Thank you all for talking behind my back when you could have just asked me.
Why is your hair so short? Why is your hair so long? Oh yeah! Maybe that’s just because everyone likes to express their individuality. That’s a crazy idea.
If you aren’t gay, then why do you support equal rights? It might have to do with the word “Equal.” It’s such a nice notion, don’t you think? It’s a nod to the fact that everyone on this crazy planet is human and should be treated fairly. Maybe I support equality because I’m a decent human being myself.
Why is country music your least favorite genre? Because I feel like the musicians (for the most part) are entirely uncreative. It’s the same chords and the same topics over, and over, and over again. Also, whoever invented the nightmare that is “country rap” or “hick hop” has a very special place in hell waiting for them.

In closing, I’d like to share just one last message: Even if I was attracted to girls I would be the exact same person. Whoever I love is my business and not yours.

***Just a small note, if you have any other questions you’d like to ask me, shoot me an email on the Say, Sara page :)

Peace, love, and staying awesome,
Sara

The Book Thief Stole My Heart

The Book Thief is beautiful, dark, gritty, and sentimental all at once. The author, Markus Zusak, writes such realistic imagery to the point that you feel as though you are in the story, hiding in the shadows of Himmel Street. If you have not read this brilliant book, here is a small summary:

“It’s just a small story really, about among other things: a girl, some words, an accordionist, some fanatical Germans, a Jewish fist-fighter, and quite a lot of thievery. . . .
Set during World War II in Germany, Markus Zusak’s groundbreaking new novel is the story of Liesel Meminger, a foster girl living outside of Munich. Liesel scratches out a meager existence for herself by stealing when she encounters something she can’t resist–books. With the help of her accordion-playing foster father, she learns to read and shares her stolen books with her neighbors during bombing raids as well as with the Jewish man hidden in her basement before he is marched to Dachau.”

I won’t go into much of the plot because that would leave you with nothing to look forward to, but I will say that I cried incredibly hard at the end of the novel. In fact, I have drawn a crude sketch of myself after putting the book down.

 

So, that’s a pretty accurate representation. Also, it’s important to note that the scribble on my shirt is actually supposed to be my heart breaking. I know. I’m lame.

        The book is just so magnificent. It truly captures the essence of being human and gives it to the reader in such a unique perspective. 

The story itself is told from Death’s point of view. He navigates the world, searching for souls that have passed on and he carries them over to the other side.

 

Every book that has ever made me cry has one simple element: realistic, gritty, storytelling. My favorite books are those that remind me of what it is to be human. I suppose tha it must be the examples of the strong human resilience in the face of adversity that captivates me every single time.

I have been seeing this book on the shelves in bookstores for several years now, and I had never once wanted to buy it. When it was assigned to my contemporary literature class by the most amazing teacher ever, I was so excited to finally read it.

Thank you, Markus Zusak, for writing such a beautifully dark story, and thank you, Ms. Bibb, for assigning such a brilliant book.

 

Peace, love, and salty tears,

Sara