Sunday, August 19, 2012

What I Believe

I have written this post at least three times now, and never published a single one of them. They end up as lonely drafts on my "posts" page, and I don't revisit them again.
But today, I feel like posting it. I don't care if it means losing followers, either.
From the very start of this blog, I've said that this is for me. It's a project that continuously documents my life, and I don't sugar coat. I also don't omit any of my views, opinions, or beliefs.
That being said, I'm going to talk about my religious views.

I was raised a Christian. I went to church on Sunday, I took part in the youth group, I went on mission trips. But in the sixth grade, at the start of a terrible depression, I started to question things.
I questioned God's existence, among other things, and I felt horrible. I mean, the Christian belief is what I was raised with! It was a part of my life, and thinking for just one moment that it could all just be a very clever and elaborate story hurt me. So I stopped questioning it. I tried to move past the questions.
It's worth noting that I live in the south. People here are, for the most part, very religious and very conservative.
One day, a friend of mine asked me if I had been "saved", which is another way of saying 'baptized' in case anyone didn't know. I told her that I hadn't been, and she basically acted as if I was going to hell unless I got "saved". For a while, I let that get to me. I was worried about dying before I was baptized. And then it occurred to me. The God that I believed in wasn't that cruel or unforgiving. The God that I believed in did not condemn people to hell just because they worshiped in different ways or didn't get baptized.
As I got older, I realized that I didn't agree with many of the views of the church. I also saw how hypocritical many "Christians" could be. I saw how much they judged, and openly hated people. Now, I'm not saying every Christian is like this. My mother isn't this way.
There were just so many things that I didn't agree with.

Once, I got into a huge argument with one of my friends because he said that anyone who wasn't a Christian would be condemned to hell.
I don't believe that for a second.
Just because someone is born into a Jewish family, does not mean that they are going to be sent to hell.
I mean, come on.
But this guy, he told me that anyone who didn't buy into Christianity was going to hell.

Around the same time, I was beginning to see the blind hatred and ignorance towards homosexuals.
I heard so much about, "They choose to be gay! It's a choice!"
Why in the hell would you choose to be gay? I mean, if it was a choice I might be gay just to prove a point, but I'm not. I'm straight, and I support gay rights because gay rights are human rights. End of story.
I don't give a damn that it's in the bible. The bible was written hundreds of years ago and it wasn't written by God or Jesus. So to use it as a consistent argument to condemn homosexuality is ludicrous. This is, in fact, the same bible in which women are not seen as equals to men.

It was all of these things, and more, that led me to have beliefs of my own.
So, I have decided to outline my major beliefs right now.

  1. I believe in the existence of a God, but I don't have a religion to go with it.
    There are many different religions that believe in a singular god who is very similar to the Christian version of God. 
  2. Christianity is a fairly new religion when you look at the many different religions throughout history. 
  3. I believe in science, evolution, etc. Not that you can't believe in those things and still be a Christian, because you can. 
  4. I believe in a God that does not punish people for who they love. Also, you can be a Christian and believe that being gay is a-okay. My mom does, and she's Christian. Thank you, mom, for sharing many of my same ideals. 
  5. I don't know what comes after this life, but I don't imagine that I'll care too much since I'll be dead when I find out. As Peter Pan said, "To die will be the greatest adventure of all".
  6. I believe that there is so much that we just don't know
  7. I am perfectly happy with my idea of God. 
Those are only a few of my beliefs, but they do a good job of summing it up.

Peace, love, and Taco Bell,

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